How To Balance Life And Work --Tool # 1 Sleep

How To Balance Life And Work --Tool #1 Sleep

Our toolbox on how to balance life and work starts with the tool of sleep.

Many clients have asked me about how important sleep really is.
It is critical to our health, our immune system, our healthy eating choices,
our sex lives and I think, most importantly, to how often we laugh.

It can be a challenge to get 7 - 8 hours of sleep a night...
and there have been many nights when I would just lay in bed thinking this
is never going to work. 
I would just lay there --all the thoughts of the day flooding my brain making sleep elusive. 

So I decided, rather than continue to toss and turn; I would sit up and read some nice
inspirational stories and soon I was fast asleep.  

Now, I have a strict bedtime of 9:30 pm to get right out of bed at 6 am ready
and eager for the day.

Here is a step by step guide for going to sleep and staying asleep.

1-    Make the commitment to add sleep to your life. 
2-    Plan your bedtime right when you wake up in the morning.
3-    Have a comfortable bed, sheets, and goose down pillow!
4-    Wear comfy, warm pajamas… the ones you can’t wait to put on.
5-    Announce your bedtime to your family so everyone understands when your day is done.
6-    Prepare breakfast, empty the dishwasher,  plan your dinner for the next night.
7-    Procede to your bed…wash, and slip into your sheets.
8-    Read 20 minutes of your favorite book or magazine.  This is fun reading only!
No work assignments allowed.
9-    Lights out and breathe and begin the ritual of going to sleep.  
10-    Focus exclusively good things in your life… list the blessings you have
11-    Do not concentrate on falling asleep.  Your task is to relax and chant again
and again how wonderful, amazing you and your life is.
12-    If you do wake up in the middle of the night- do not move, get up or stir. 
Just refocus and revisit your positive thoughts.
 

Sleep... It is the basis of positive psychology and training your brain to filter out negative
thoughts and is critically important to improving productivity.  As with any new tool for the box,
as you learn how to balance life and work, it will take time and commitment to learn
and successfully utilize sleep to help you balance life. 

Pleasant dreams!

 

The Author Wendy Kaufman, is the founder of Balancing Life’s Issues a national training company
with a network of more than 500 trainers. 

Wendy and staff bring a wide range of work and life balance programs to corporations, not-for-profit
organizations and employee assistance programs. Some of the most popular topics include:
Emotional Intelligence; Managing Stress with Humor and Health and Wellness.  

How To Balance Life and Work programs prepare participants to cope with the stresses of today
and face the challenges of tomorrow. Her seminars encourage participants to think differently.

Wendy is a senior trainer with the American Management Association. She earned a
Master’s Degree in Industrial Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania. 
You can contact Wendy at Wendy@BalancingLifesIssues.com or 914-762-9075.

Balance in Work and Life - creating your toolbox for life.

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Balance in Work and Life - creating your toolbox for life.

We have all heard of the anomaly called work-life balance.  What is it? And is attainable?

I would like to introduce you to a new tool for your tool box to aid in your quest for a more meaningful, balanced life.  I have been studying, teaching and living work and life balance for 25 years.  The studying and teaching part has been easy.  It is the living part that proves more difficult. 

I practice what I preach intentionally utilizing all the tools that I will describe.  My journey began 10 years after I started studying the need for balance in work and life.  I was a working mom with 3 young children and a husband in suburbia.  We shared household chores but the children were my responsibility whereas the finances were his.  Many couples find living in this manner adequate.  For me, life changed the day my husband left.  Now, as I have come to learn, everyone has his or her own “story” that makes achieving balance so challenging.  I made many attempts to “do it all” failing miserably on a daily basis. 

I have developed a list of questions to self-assess the balance in your life.

• Are you tired all the time?
• Do you over react to the smallest of things?
• How often have you said –“I wish I hadn’t said that” ?
• Have you missed important life cycle events?
• What do people say about you? To your face?  And especially behind your back?
• Do you like your life?
• Do you wake up happy most of the time?
• Are you loved? Do you love?

Failing this test miserably motivated me to put into action all that I had been teaching about how to pursue a balanced life.  Stay tuned as I roll out my toolbag for achieving balance in work and life

 

The Author Wendy Kaufman, is the founder of Balancing Life’s Issues a national training company with a network of more than 500 trainers. 

Wendy and staff bring a wide range of work and life balance programs to corporations, not-for-profit organizations and employee assistance programs. Some of the most popular topics include: Emotional Intelligence; Managing Stress with Humor and Health and Wellness.  

Balance in work and life programs prepare participants to cope with the stresses of today and face the challenges of tomorrow. Her seminars encourage participants to think differently.

Wendy is a senior trainer with the American Management Association. She earned a Master’s Degree in Industrial Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania.  You can contact Wendy at Wendy@BalancingLifesIssues.com or 914-762-9075.

 

Sex, Work and Life Balance and the Happy Single

Sex, Work and Life Balance and the Happy Single

While none of us likes to admit we watch or follow celebrities attempts to achieve balance in work and life, we are all fascinated by their seemingly perfect lives. Jennifer Aniston’s latest interview with People Magazine is interesting because she states that she in happy without a significant other.

Here is the problem or at least question I have with that – in order to succeed at our peak, one of our work and life balance buckets is having a significant other. Why is this so important? Because as human beings we need meaningful sexual intimacy.

True balance in work and life includes sex. Having unfulfilled urges and desires weighs on us. This is not to say that Jennifer Aniston is not having sex – but that is not the sex we are talking about here. It is not the kind that makes you feel connected with someone in meaningful way and makes you feel special so you can go out and really succeed.

There is a reason that committed happy couples live longer and it is because having a healthy sex life drives us. Jennifer is finding her happiness in other ways because her financial bucket is overflowing. She is living in denial that the other bucket does not matter. I wish in her interview she acknowledged the fact that her relationship (sex) bucket needs work. Since this is a balance in work and life blog I would be remiss if I didn’t include sexual relationships in that.

I know I am going to get a lot of comments on this from those who are alone and believe they are happy, bring it on! I want to hear about your work and life balance issues.

The Author Wendy Kaufman, is the founder of Balancing Life’s Issues a national training company with a network of more than 500 trainers.

Wendy and staff bring a wide range of work and life balance programs to corporations, not-for-profit organizations and employee assistance programs. Some of the most popular topics include: Emotional Intelligence; Managing Stress with Humor and health wellness programs.

Balance in work and life programs prepare participants to cope with the stresses of today and face the challenges of tomorrow. Her seminars encourage participants to think differently.

Wendy is a senior trainer with the American Management Association. She earned a Master’s Degree in Industrial Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania. You can contact Wendy at Wendy@BalancingLifesIssues.com or 914-762-9075.

Stop Blaming the Economy For Lack Of Balance In Work And Life

Stop Blaming the Economy For Lack Of Balance In Work And Life

While work may not wait, you also can't get back valuable family life moments

The last month has been a crazy, whirlwind series of work, work, work. I have worked 60 hours a week,
barely seen my kids and cannot even recognize my husband. I see my kids being "sad" that I am not
around and even my husband misses me.

I am in the process of writing a full cover story on balance in work and life for small business owners and realize
that the irony is shocking. I need to stop and regroup and revisit my bucket system. I will never get back
those minutes of my life and while I am grateful for the work. I see how easy it is for your life to become unbalanced.

As I began to interview business people for the article, a majority of owners shared with me that they are too scared
of losing any business - that they have thrown work and life balance out the window and blame the "new economy."
One owner told me their “family will wait but their business won’t!”

This blog is screaming, yelling, ranting and raving “NO, NO, NO!” Not just to you but to myself as well.

I am one year away from being an empty-nester and never again will I have children home to see and kiss every
morning and night. Family doesn't wait and experiences are missed forever.

Yes, I am empathetic to money issues -I pay for 2 college tuitions and save for one more plus medical school -
but I know there is more to life and it seems we desperately need a wake-up call.

My fear is that all these owners who are working from
morning to night will wake up sick and alone someday.

Here is some good, concrete advice to help balance your life during this "new economy."

1. Skip many networking meetings.

Be very, very picky about which groups to join and make sure the meetings you are attending are the best and that you are spending your time wisely.

2. Block off time.

• Go through your children's school calendar and block off any necessary dates - school vacations, superintendent days, and trip days. Prom season is important and fun to be around. Don't miss it!
• Birthdays are always fun and part of being in a family.
• Block off sometime and enjoy! Way too many clients are missing their moms 70th birthdays to go to a networking group with all unemployed people.

3. Go home in a good mood.

Your family deserves to see you at your best. I know that that is not possible to do all the time but most of the time is achievable. I drive around the block two to three extra times sometimes playing some upbeat music and remind myself how blessed I am to have such a great family. When I walk through the door I am ready to be a mom! The same is true in the morning when I am going to work. I give myself extra time commuting and remind myself how much I love my job and then when I get to the client I am raring to go.

4. Nip unnecessary interruptions in the bud.

Every second of every minute of every day counts. Be conscious of time wasters!

I would love to hear from you! Comment below: how many hours a week are your working now? What family activities have you missed? How do you feel about it? Let’s start a dialogue about life choices and that way we can learn from each other!

The Author Wendy Kaufman, is the founder of Balancing Life’s Issues a national training company with a network of more than 500 trainers.

Wendy and staff bring a wide range of work and life balance programs to corporations, not-for-profit organizations and employee assistance programs. Some of the most popular topics include: Emotional Intelligence; Managing Stress with Humor and Health and Wellness.

Balance in work and life programs prepare participants to cope with the stresses of today and face the challenges of tomorrow. Her seminars encourage participants to think differently.

Wendy is a senior trainer with the American Management Association. She earned a Master’s Degree in Industrial Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania. You can contact Wendy at Wendy@BalancingLifesIssues.com or 914-762-9075.

Creating Balance In Work and Life - Aren’t All Small Business Owners a Little Narcissistic?

Aren’t All Small Business Owners a Little Narcissistic?

Creating Balance In Work and Life

 

What we can all learn from Mayor Bloomberg's love affair with himself

 

Lookiing at the most recent edition of The New Yorker- the cover depicts Mayor Bloomberg

having a love affair with himself. I was fascinated and quite honestly, somewhat motivated by

the Mayor’s comments. He said he likes what he sees when he looks in the mirror and is

happy with the choices he has made, which reminds me of my  five bucket theory for

work and life balance.

 

Obviously his finances are in total order as he is giving away most of his money,

and his salary is $1 a year. His children seem to be thriving, his relationship with

his girlfriend is stable, and he appears to be in good health.

 

So, what's the moral of his story?

 

The truth is narcissism is good for business. Whether I like his policies or not is irrelevant,

what I admire and learn from are his successes and confidence.

Many of us started businesses because we believed we could do it.

We had that extra bit of arrogance to believe we could overcome the odds.

 

The lesson of the day is let’s all be a little more narcissistic and like what

we see when we look in the mirror.

 

The Author Wendy Kaufman, is the founder of Balancing Life’s Issues a national training company with a network of more than 500 trainers. 

Wendy and staff bring a wide range of work and life balance programs to corporations, not-for-profit organizations and employee assistance programs. Some of the most popular topics include: Emotional Intelligence; Managing Stress with Humor and Health and Wellness.  

Balance in work and life programs prepare participants to cope with the stresses of today and face the challenges of tomorrow. Her seminars encourage participants to think differently.

Wendy is a senior trainer with the American Management Association. She earned a Master’s Degree in Industrial Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania.  You can contact Wendy at Wendy@BalancingLifesIssues.com or 914-762-9075.